Recovery; White text over a purple background in the bottom left corner that reads "Maintaining Eating Disorder Recovery as a College Freshman". The rest of the image is a photo of a young woman sitting on a couch with a laptop in her lap.

Maintaining Eating Disorder Recovery as a College Freshman

College can be a difficult transition for anyone, but if you’re in recovery for an eating disorder, it can be a particularly stressful transition! 

Some of the challenges of maintaining your recovery while returning to school include: 

Change in Routine

When in recovery, changes in routine can be tough. Routines allow for some comfort and dependability, because when we have them, we know what to expect. Routines also have very practical uses in recovery–they affect meal planning, treatment appointments, sleeping habits, etc. All of which play a role in recovery! Navigating a new routine can be challenging, and can feel overwhelming, so giving care and consideration to what your new routine will be is important. 

Increased Demands + Independence

Going to college is an exciting time because it is the first taste of independence so many of us have! However, gaining independence is also a lot of responsibility–especially if we’re not used to it. It can be easy to not set any boundaries for yourself, but that’s not a sustainable way to take care of yourself. At the same time, you’ll also need to use some of that newfound independence to balance the demands of your school work, which might be more intense than you’re used to. It can be extremely stressful navigating that responsibility for the first time, and increased stress can lead to an increase in eating disorder symptoms. 

Exercise + Diet Culture

On a college campus you’ll be surrounded by other young people, who are also surrounded by the constant messaging on social media about diet and beauty standards. Additionally, gyms on campus may be full of college level athletes training in ways that other folks who don’t need intense conditioning for a sport shouldn’t be pushing themselves to compete with. You might be surrounded by fear of the “freshman fifteen” or feel pressure to skip meals to study for exams with other students. The culture around food and exercise on a college campus may not be the healthiest one–and it’s important to prepare for that with a counselor beforehand so you have coping mechanisms you can use when need be. 

What can you do to maintain your recovery?

Consider your schedule

Be gentle with yourself as you adjust! College is a big change and you don’t need to try to do it all at once. This means, don’t push yourself to take too many classes your first semester while you’re still getting used to the new expectations. Really think about what your limit is before you feel yourself burning out. 

Consider also taking classes that you wouldn’t consider as the most challenging. It’s a whole new style of learning in college, there’s nothing wrong with taking it slow to figure out what you can handle. That way you’re not overworking yourself and you are reducing the amount of stress you might experience. 

When thinking about your schedule,  consider any habits you have that are helpful to your recovery (social meals, treatment appointments, etc.) and what will be needed for those in your regular routines.

Make a recovery plan before you go

Are you working with a therapist right now? Will you continue to work with them? Or will there be someone on campus to connect with? Have group supports been part of your recovery plan? What is available in terms of group support at your school? Does your current therapist have plans or ideas on what will be important to your recovery at school? 

Be sure to set up any regular appointments and checkups with your treatment team ahead of time, to help provide you the professional support you may need to stay “on track.” 

Are you working with a dietitian right now?  Work with them to help you maintain recovery.

You might want  research on what mealtimes are like at school. Consider questions like: What food is available when? Where are the places to eat? What are their hours? Do you know what food do they provide? What are the meal plans like? Is there one that is more conducive to your recovery? Together with your dietitian it might be helpful to gather some information about what the different meal plans are, and make some pros and cons for each of them.

If you don’t have a treatment team, go to the student health center on campus and they will be able to assist you. 

Remember: it’s normal for eating disorder symptoms to recur in times of high stress and periods of transition. But by taking time to consider how your recovery will be impacted in this period of transition, you can create a plan to cope with stress and continue with your recovery. Remember, you only have to take it one day at a time! 

If you need help in your eating disorder recovery or not sure if you have an eating disorder or not, please click here to schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation with me. 

White text over a purple background in the bottom left corner that reads "The Body Image-Eating Disorder Connection". The rest of the image is a photo of a woman holding a dress up to her body in a mirror.

The Body Image-Eating Disorder Connection

What is body image?

Body image is how we perceive our bodies and looks. In other words, it is what we say to ourselves or our thoughts about our body. Having body dissatisfaction or a negative body image means that the majority of thoughts about one’s body are negative.

For example, while looking in the mirror, Sarah says to herself, “I am so ugly.” which then produces possible feelings of shame and sadness. However, Sarah doesn’t, get feedback from others that she is “ugly.”. In fact, she often gets comments from friends and co-workers that she looks nice.

When Anna looks in the mirror, she often says to herself, “My thighs are gross,” again leading to feelings of sadness and shame. In contrast, Alicia looks in the mirror and thinks “I am looking good today,” which may lead to feelings of happiness.

How we perceive our bodies is influenced by many factors, including family, friends, media, gender identity, culture, and the health-care system, to name a few. Body image is not static. It may change depending on our mood, situation, stage of life, or the season.

The body image-eating disorder connection

The majority of those who suffer with eating disorders have a negative body image. One of the key features of eating disorders is the overvaluation of weight, shape, and eating habits on self-worth.

Self-worth is how and what we think about ourselves. In other words, those who struggle with eating disorders equate much of their self-worth with their ability to control their weight, shape, and eating habits. Having a negative body image often keeps the eating disorder going.

Sarah from the example above, is able to identify that she has lots of good things going on in her life, including a strong friend group, a new job that allows her to be financially independent, her volunteer work, and close ties to her family. However, she places much of her self-worth on how she looks. She insists that her other qualities “don’t count”.

Think of self-worth in terms of a pie chart made up of several different categories. Sarah’s self-worth pie chart looks like this:

As you can see, Sarah places a lot of her self-worth on her ability to control her body and eating. When the majority of self-worth is tied to the pursuit of eating “correctly” and maintaining a certain weight and shape, other things that make us feel worthy are ignored. Furthermore, when we can’t control our looks or food in the way that we think we “ought” to, feelings of failure sink self-worth even lower.

Often in the pursuit of improving body satisfaction, we try to change the way our body looks with diet, exercise, and surgery. However, this often comes with lots of distress. One of the most impactful ways to improve your body image is to not actually change your body, but to reduce the emphasis placed on looks as related to self-worth.

After Sarah recovered from her eating disorder, including improving her body image, her self-worth pie chart looked more like this:

You can see that body shape/weight decreased in influence on self-worth. Other categories increased as Sarah was able to experience more joy in those areas and even learned that creativity and spirituality were additional sources of joy for her.

Body dissatisfaction is a key component of eating disorders. Healing your body image is needed in the recovery from an eating disorder.

Body image is often one of the hardest parts of an eating disorder to heal, but it is possible. Remember that to heal your body image, you don’t need to change your body, but rather your thoughts about your body.

If you think you have an eating disorder which often includes a negative body image it is crucial that you get professional help. To learn more about treatment please click here.

Therapy work can help you stop feeling out of control and gain a sense of calm in relationship with food and your body. I would love to help you leave the food worry behind and be free to create the life you want. Schedule your free 15 minute consultation today.

Graphic that reads in white font on a purple background "Anorexia Nervosa: One Size Does NOT Fit All" Next to a large photo of a woman bowling.

Anorexia Nervosa: One Size Does NOT Fit All

Unfortunately, there are many incorrect assumptions associated with eating disorders. One I see a lot is the assumption that in order to have an eating disorder, particularly anorexia nervosa, one has to have very low body weight.

This is simply not true.

Sadly these assumptions block those suffering from eating disorders from getting the life-saving treatment they need.

In fact, most people with eating disorders don’t necessarily fit neatly into an eating disorder category.

Eating disorders are more about how the person relates to food, exercise, and body than what a person looks like.

Let’s take a closer look at an eating disorder called “Atypical” Anorexia Nervosa (AAN). I put the word atypical in quotes because it is my understanding that more people suffer from AAN than anorexia nervosa, so there is really nothing atypical about it. Basically, AAN is the same as anorexia nervosa with one exception – those with AAN don’t meet the criteria for being underweight like those suffering from anorexia nervosa. In fact, some with AAN may live in a large body.

Symptoms of ANN are exactly the same as anorexia nervosa. AAN includes significant caloric restriction, intense fear of gaining weight, and overvaluation of body size and shape (ie. evaluating self-worth based on weight and shape).

Typical signs of Atypical Anorexia Nervosa could include:

  • Extreme concern about weight and shape
  • Preoccupation and worry about food
  • Restriction of total calories consumed
  • Avoidance of eating certain types or categories of food
  • Avoidance of social situations that involve food
  • Misuse of exercise or overexercising.

Often the assumption is that only white, young, female, and very thin people experience eating disorders. Because of this assumption, many eating disorders go undiagnosed. It is not uncommon for people with eating disorders, particularly those who live in large bodies, to get prescribed weight-loss diets which actually makes the eating disorder worse.

Is AAN as dangerous or serious as other eating disorders?

All eating disorders can be harmful to both physical and mental health. Eating disorders can be associated with isolation, rigid thinking, poor self-esteem, anxiety, depression, poor focus, and sleep disturbance.

What to do if you think you have an eating disorder:

Because of the abundance of misleading and harmful nutrition, weight, and exercise information, sufferers of eating disorders are often led to believe that they can recover from their eating disorder on their own. Sadly, this often prolongs the eating disorder and the suffering. If you think you have an eating disorder, here are some next steps to take:

  • Find a treatment provider who has experience in treating eating disorders.
  • Find a therapist and/or dietitian. This can be a good place to start. In your search make sure the clinician has expertise in treating eating disorders.
  • Read about eating disorders.
  • Listen to podcasts.
  • Know that recovery from eating disorders is possible!

If you’re looking for more support in eating disorder recovery, I can help you make peace with food and your body. Drop me a note today.

white text on a purple background over a photo of balloons in the sky that reads "5 Reasons not to Diet in 2021 (or Ever)"

5 Reasons not to Diet in 2021 (or Ever)

Unless you are taking a break from social media and the news, you most likely have been bombarded with messages about dieting and weight related New Year’s resolutions. Diet programs are promising the magic bullet for good health and weight loss in the New Year.

Maybe this year you are re-thinking your New Year’s resolutions. Perhaps you are beginning to notice that dieting is taking up too much space in your life or you are tired of worrying about what you eat or what you look like. It could be you are looking to “get off the diet roller coaster” permanently and heal your relationship with food and your body.

If you are ready to give up dieting, you’re not alone. Consider these five reasons to quit dieting for good:

1. Dieting for permanent weight loss is ineffective.

While dieting can be effective for weight loss for some, usually weight loss is short-lived. In fact, scientists have little to no evidence to show that dieting is an effective means for keeping lost weight off. Maybe you haven’t been able to stick to your diet. It is not you, it is the diet. Diets are nearly impossible to follow for the long term. And then when diets are “broken”, it leaves the person feeling bad about themselves and disconnected from their body, doing more damage than good.

2. Dieting is a known risk factor for developing disordered eating or a full-blown eating disorder.

The causes of eating disorders are complex and can be caused by a range of biological, social, and psychological factors. Researches have identified that dieting is a risk factor for developing an eating disorder. The majority of clients that I treat with an eating disorder have had experience with dieting, usually motivated by body dissatisfaction. Dieting can contribute to more problems with your relationship with food instead of solving them.

3. Dieting can wreak havoc on your mental health.

Diets often promise control over food and even our lives. Starting a new diet can even feel exhilarating. But, have you ever noticed when you are dieting you spend more time thinking about food? Or you begin to feel out of control around food, maybe experience binge eating-like behavior? You may even avoid certain social situations in order to stay on the diet.

Additionally, when a “diet rule” is “broken” (not because of laziness or lack of willpower on your part—remember, clinical studies show that diets can’t be followed long term), you might experience increased feelings of shame, loss of control and failure. These feelings can drive us further from self-care and contribute to a poorer relationship with food.

4. Diets reinforce weight bias and stigma.

Weight bias and stigma are just what they sound like- discriminating against people based on their body size, usually large body size. Diets inherently send the message that large or fat bodies are “bad” or “unhealthy”, which reinforces fatphobia. It is well documented that rates of weight bias and stigma are on the rise. In fact, weight stigma and bias happen at higher rates than discrimination based on age or gender. Weight bias and stigma can affect physical and mental health independent of body size in various ways, including an increase in stress, poorer mental and physical health, and can contribute to problematic eating behaviors independent of body size. To read more about weight-bias and stigma, click here.

5. Diets often de-emphasize other determinants of health.

You have probably heard the saying, “You are what you eat”. This couldn’t be further from the truth. What and how we eat may be one part of our health, however, there are multiple factors that contribute to health. There are several determinants of health including genetics, economic status, environmental and physical influences, medical care, and social factors. Diet programs often give the illusion that by eating in a particular way you are guaranteed good health, often neglecting other health factors.

These are just a few good reasons to ditch dieting. However, you may be thinking, “Now what? How do I not diet? How do I feed myself?”. These are common and valid questions. If you have been dieting on and off for years or have an eating disorder, navigating food in our society that is steeped in diet culture can be confusing and downright daunting.

Here are some resources to get you started on learning how to improve your relationship with food and your body:

an infographic that titled " 5 reasons not to diet in 2021 (or ever)". The tips read, in order: "Dieting for permanent weight loss is ineffective." "Dieting is a known risk factor for developing disordered eating or an eating disorder." "Dieting can wreak havoc on your mental health." "Diets reinforce weight bias and stigma." "Diets often de-emphasize other determinants of health." There is a small photo next to each statement. The photos, in order, show: a white lightbulb on a yellow background, a yellow caution sign on a blush background, a brain wearing a red stethoscope on a blue background, a blank notebook page next to a green pencil on a blue and yellow background, and a person holding a megaphone on a purple background.
white text on a purple background over a photo of balloons in the sky that reads "5 Reasons not to Diet in 2021 (or Ever)"

If you’re looking for more support as you make peace with food and ditch the diets for good, I can help you learn to trust your body and learn to feed yourself again. Get in touch today!

Diet Culture, COVID-19, and Weight Stigma: 2020 in Review

Diet Culture, COVID-19, and Weight Stigma: 2020 in Review

At the end of every year, I like to put together a post that collects everything I’ve published on my blog over the last year. And what a year it’s been. This year is nothing like we imagined it would be. We have lost almost a year of being with family and friends, experiencing new things, and living our ‘normal’ lives. If you’re feeling grief about this year, the lives lost and changed, and what could have been, you’re not alone. 

This year has been hard, sad, lonely, scary, weird, and pretty much any other adjective out there. It can be hard to hold space for all of those things at once, so be gentle with yourself as you work through your feelings about 2020. 

Here’s what I wrote about this year: 

This year, I wrote a lot about the COVID-19 pandemic and how that interacts with folks in eating disorder recovery. 

When things get hard, communities thrive. The eating disorder recovery community is more important than ever with many of us isolated and unable to connect with other ED survivors in real life. I wrote about 5 Ways to Stay on Track With Eating Disorder Recovery During COVID-19, Virtual (and Free) Eating Disorder Support Groups During COVID-19, and Coping With COVID-19 and Eating Disorder Recovery: Tips for College Students.

Rejecting Diet culture

One of my favorite ways to learn about rejecting the diet mentality is through podcasts! I put together a list of my top podcasts to help you break free from diet culture. (I also included a tip for how to find anti-diet resources: “It’s easy to be wary of what you find related to body positivity and anti-diet resources, since the movement has been flooded with people trying to cash in without spreading the actual message of the anti-diet movement. When looking for a trusted resource online, make sure that they mention on their website (hopefully prominently!) that they believe in dismantling diet culture, center larger bodies, and don’t mention weight loss anywhere on their site.”

Eating Disorders

Eating disorders are a complicated subject. One of my goals is to help people challenged with ED and other food & weight-related concerns to move from constantly worrying about food and their weight to being free to create the lives they want. The first step here is understanding what eating disorders actually are. To help, I discussed 3 Important FAQs about Binge Eating Disorder on the blog. While some of us understand the basics of eating disorders and anxiety on our own, it’s rare to see a blog post connect the two and tell you what you need to know if you’re living with an eating disorder and an anxiety disorder. I wrote about frequently asked questions related to eating disorders and anxiety to share what I know!

Weight Bias + Stigma

Weight bias is everywhere we look in our culture. It’s led to systematic discrimination of larger bodies in many areas of life – medical care, job opportunities, social interactions, to name a few. So many folks railing against people in larger bodies don’t realize that what really causes negative health outcomes is a result of stigma, not a result of having a larger body, so I wrote about how weight bias and stigma are the real hazards to health, not body size. 

Diet Culture, COVID-19, and Weight Stigma: 2020 in Review

If there are any topics you’d like me to cover in 2021, let me know! You can message me here. If you’re looking for even more resources, make sure you’re following me on Facebook and Pinterest!Every week, I share resources from myself + other experts in the field on both platforms!

FAQ: Eating Disorders and Anxiety

FAQ: Eating Disorders and Anxiety

It is normal to feel worry and fear from time to time. We all have experienced worry before a big test at school, a deadline at work, or a big event. Anxiety is a normal part of life. In fact, fear can help us stay safe by alerting us to possible danger, and a little bit of worrying can be motivating for some to take care of tasks. However, if you frequently feel and have intense worry, this could be an indication of an anxiety disorder.

Q: How common is anxiety?

A: Anxiety disorders are the most common mental health conditions. It is estimated that worldwide, more than 264 million people have anxiety, and about 40 million Americans have it. Anxiety is more common in girls and women than in boys and men. There are different kinds of anxiety disorders including generalized anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), panic disorders, phobias, and post-traumatic distress disorder (PTSD), to name a few.

Q: How do I know if I have an anxiety disorder?

A: The short answer is: Talk to your doctor to help determine if you have an anxiety disorder.

Let your doctor know if you experience any of these common symptoms of anxiety, including excessive and uncontrollable worry, feelings of nervousness, restlessness, and tension, trouble sleeping, gastro-intestinal upset, sweating, trembling, rapid heart rate, or a sense of panic or impending doom. Again we all experience anxiety from time to time, but if you frequently experience some of the symptoms above, it may be time to talk to your doctor.

Q: I have an eating disorder and I think I have anxiety. Can you help me with both?

A: Studies show that 50-80% of people who have an eating disorder also struggle with anxiety. It is not always clear which comes first – the eating disorder or anxiety – or if the anxiety and eating disorder emerged roughly at the same time.

Anxiety usually makes the eating disorder symptoms worse, so it must be treated simultaneously with the eating disorder.

It is standard in eating disorder treatment to also treat co-occurring conditions whether it is anxiety, depression, or another condition. Many therapies or methods used to treat eating disorders can also be used to treat anxiety.

Q: How is anxiety treated?

A: Anxiety is very treatable. Anxiety disorders can be treated with psychotherapy as well as medication. I use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to help treat anxiety and eating disorders. In a nutshell, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is a well-studied treatment that proposes that thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are interconnected and greatly influence one another.

CBT helps identify and challenge thoughts that are distorted or inaccurate that often lead to intense and pervasive feelings such as anxiety and depression.

Practicing CBT skills with “homework” between counseling sessions is something that I use regularly with clients. It has been my experience that clients like to have tools that they can use outside of sessions to help them manage their anxiety and eating disorder, plus it can speed up treatment the more the skills are practiced.

To learn more about anxiety and treatment here are some resources to get you started:

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If you have started to notice that your anxiety is getting in the way of your normal functioning, it may be a good time to talk to a therapist. Get in touch here!